This was the story of my life for most of my growing up years. Though I really wanted to, I never “went out with” boys, didn’t date much in high school, rarely had dates to dances or was even asked to dance. I was left standing on the sidelines many, many times. In fact, I didn’t even dance once with my date at my own senior prom and to be honest, in that case, I didn’t even mind. But looking back, it’s pretty sad.
So glad that I finally grew out of my wallflowerness in college. I stopped caring by then.
Today I got my hair cut. It's been needing a trim for months and I finally got it done. It came out a bit shorter than I had expected and the hair is in shock, but I kinda dig it. Feeling sassy and fun.
This is the dress that I wore to my 10 year high school reunion. Next summer, it will be our 20th. Sheesh. I was so vain at the reunion that I had to announce to everyone that I was pregnant (even though it was only a couple weeks) as the new dress was tight over my tummy (I showed fast). I had kept my figure all those years and then got pregnant right before seeing all the old friends again. So vain. I won't go back to my 20 year or another, I don't think.
Your body language is perfect to convey wallflower, but your dress and overall look belie it. Your h.s. story could be mine -- in fact, I suspect it is more common than not. Hard years! Haven't ever been to a reunion -- so am not sure whether I've missed something or not!
Amanda I met you and you are certainly no wallflower! Hey high school sucked for just about all of us, but it was just a blip in time. You're wonderful and looking great!
@taffy Ha...I know. The dress is all wrong. I got rid of all of my wallflowery dresses. Shoot;-). Thanks, Taffy!
@anzere03 Glad to teach you the expression. Wish I hadn't lived it, but ah well, I came out the stronger. And kinda glad that I was spared the heartbreak of young stupid love.
you're looking great, kiddo! i mean, look at you! you're all trimmed and sexy and gorgeous! you look like you just got out of high school. you look fabulous!!!
This is wonderful. Your posture and expression really tell a story! I love how you processed it and your outfit. You should definitely go to your 20th! Everyone is vain at their 10th and probably didn't even notice your comments because they were busy doing the same!
@kwind I helped plan the 10th, some people were really awful about it, so many complaints and I even had someone attempt to plan an alternate party and use all of the email address that we had collected. Yeah, probably not, but maybe another time down the road. I sure as hell am not planning another and I don't know if we will have any more if not? Thanks, Kim. How's Gage today?
@amandal I planned our 10th and 20th but we had a really small class... about 80 kids only. I'm still in contact with quite a few and this June marked our 26th year. Gage is about the same. He managed to be a soccer goalie for an hour today. Thanks for asking.
@kwind My class was 500+ and only 80-90 showed. The partiers from high school were still at the bar the whole night. It was funny how things didn't really change.
That's awesome that he could be goaling today. That is a hard role!!
@jsw0109 Thanks so much, Jeff. The selfie and rockin' them was a big goal of mine this year, so that is really meaningful to hear. Just so you know...:).
@seanoneill It's always something. In this case, perhaps finding a place to move. We are still looking and not settled on anything yet. We find things with parts we like but nothing has it all together in one neat package. Looking forward to deciding and to be moving forward. Winter is coming and we want to move before then. Thank you!!!
Oh Amanda, this is such a wonderful shot and such a great narrative. I think high school (secondary school to us in the UK) was like that for many of us. You're expression says wallflower, but your personality certainly doesn't. The dress looks great on you :) Fav!
You are such a great role player in your work, Amanda, but all the more so when it means something. Like a lot of the others have said, school for a lot of us is just something to endure until we get in an environment where our personalities are allowed to flourish - I was lucky, school was only rubbish until I got into sixth form (16 to 18).
And I hope you get the house thing sorted soon - stay well. Fav.
Well everyone is right; body language and facial expression might be trying to say wallflower but nothing else does. Those days are definitely gone for you. :-) Hoping the best for the living situation.
cool portrait of a wallflower - love the light and backdrop, and you did an awesome job of getting into the scene... highschool is hard on introverts, i think... there's such a mob mentality about it - and if you weren't part of a mob, it was easy to get lost in the shadows...
i love the story behind photos. you and your dress are killer and you do so well with your expressions to match the story. same here on the story. interesting how many of us share the same story, even tho at the time it seems like we are in the minority. a definite loner i was. definite. sad, too about you putting all the volunteer time into planning for an event so big, and then have it be an awful experience. wow! their loss. and i hear the same stories about people being the same at their reunions! great way to tell a story through a photograph. this is definitely my favorite kind of photography. WELL DONE.
Great moody picture that goes so well with the story. I loved h.s. and had so much fun. It is a growing time and maturing time for everyone. It is what you make of it, as is most things in life. It's about attitude and confidence and surrounding yourself with people and values that you believe in. You are going strong now and guiding your little ones to find their happiness too.
Love the honesty with which you share the difficult awkward moments .... and i think we all relate to it, i do believe, the best thing about life is everything passes away... btw, you've turned out beautiful... and the haircut is good too... :-) hugs
Fantastic capture - definitely has the feel of anxiety about it, but there's some inner confidence in the body language too. You remind me of Jamie Lee Curtis in True Lies in this pic :)
I've never been to a class reunion. It seemed to me, when I was in high school, there were the "cool" kids and the "not so cool" kids. I was in the latter group. I had lots of friends, but we didn't fit in with the jocks and the cheerleaders.
I love your expression! It's the one that I have seen in many movies about wallflowers and by 2/3 through the movie I find myself wanting to scream at the lead guy, "For Pete's sake, kiss her!"
ooooo weee baby!! Wallflower in a hothouse maybe! :-) I was in a graduating class of 13. They did have a school potluck recently, but I didn't go.LOL If I'm going to spend the money on gas to travel, I want to go see my family!
@bobfoto@amandal ok - this is worrisome... soon we'll have a name and maybe even a slogan... and then everyone will want to join in and then i'll have to leave... introvert and loner - remember? ;p
Great picture, wonderful job on the light and shadow, also like the color processing. Go to the 20th, even if only one person remembers, the will realize you have self confidence.
You do look a bit anxious but incredible that you can get into the same dress! There should be a smile of achievement on your face! However that wall flower feeling is coming through! I think many of us can relate to this!
the image is incredible .... but more importantly reading through your narratives I just want to say .... I think you are a amazing woman ... enuf said ... I'll shut up :-)
I agree with you @michaelelliott (looking great), @friend2303 (looks mighty fine), @fishy (an amazing woman), and @jsw0109 (great legs). Thanks for giving her such sweet compliments.
Amanda, I appreciate that we were both wallflowers in school. The fact that it probably helped us to retain a heightened sense of innocence (although it felt like ignorance then) makes me almost hope for the same for our kids. Although it was sometimes so painful and frustrating that at the same time I DON"T want the same for our kids. I guess we'll just pray for them, teach them to have some of the necessary skills and qualities to be cool (good hearts, personalities, leadership qualities, sporty, etc.), and let God take care of the rest.
@mikeable just for the record my friend I didn't say she looks mighty fine ... not that I disagree though ... but I'll stick to the amazing woman :-) ... BTW ...love what you said above ... wonderful sentiment :-)
nice dress, and wow, you keep same size for 10 years??? thats pretty awesome, Amanda! As for school dance - i hated those =))) I wasnt invited often too, and when I was I just felt stupid=)))
I have never been to a reunion ~ my theory is that if they meant anything to me I would still be in touch anyways ... I am still friends and in contact with a few people from school, the ones who matter to me, the others tbh I am not interested in [harsh but true]
Wonderful words and they resinate with me. I have never been to a reunion. Being on the other side of the world restricts that I suppose but I wouldn't go anyway. I am however hoping to catch up with individuals next time I am in the right country :)
Lovely photo, great dress and you look fantastic..fav :)
@thirtysevenways You are very kind, Andy. My reunion wasn't that bad, I was probably just overemotional being newly pregnant and moving across the country a week later. Lots going on. I did plan it, though, and felt unappreciated and would not plan another. We probably won't have more unless someone else takes up the reigns. It is fun to hang out with old friends, though the ones that I still really cared about, I'm still in contact with. Facebook makes it easier. Thanks for the fav, you may want to check the button though, prankster:).
I'm not home yet, but had to comment on this one. I was in the same boat during high school, but had my 50th reunion last year, and things have changed. The old cliques were gone and none of that high school stuff mattered. It was great, and I'm glad I went. I even sat between my old girlfriend and my wife at dinner! I guess my point is that things change with maturity, and those who didn't go missed a lot. You look great, and the dress / expression combination is fabulous in this fun photo!
@thirtysevenways :) How funny. Thank you, Andy. And bah humbug to the 4 am thing so many of us seem to have going on. This morning was 5:30 so that is progress.
@rvwalker I think you are right, Ross. 10 years is not enough time for people (some people anyway) to change and mature. I was the planner for my reunion. Somehow I took it on even though it wasn't my role. I am out of the area now and won't probably be involved with the planning of another. My dad just went to a big year recently...may have been his 50th. He too hung out with his ex girlfriend and my mom. Funny. They had a blast and he really enjoyed seeing his old friends. It had been nearly since high school since he had seen them. Thanks, Ross!! Always appreciate your comments.
@michaelelliott Thanks, Micheal. Even though I am recalling these memories, it is just to recall and document them. Share when I came from. I'm not wrecked or really effected by them anymore. For a time, I was really lacking in self esteem, but I picked it up somewhere. In fact, as a result of the wallflower years, I came out stronger.:)
@summerfield Hugs to you, my friend. So very kind. Up close you can see the lines on my face and a few wisps of gray, but I am aging pretty well all in all thankfully.
@adamj The reunion wasn't that bad. I was the planner though, and that made it tougher. Some of the same old drama going on, too. People hadn't changed much in 10 years. I will probably go again if there is another someday (I will just not be the one planning that again!). Thanks, friend!
@fauxtography365 I loved it. $15 clearance buy at a department store 10 years ago. I got a great deal. Granted the dye rubs off on me, but...;-) Thanks!
@mcmary 3 babies. I held the purse in front partially because it was an appropriate wallflower pose, but partially to hide the baby pooch that never fully went away, dang it;-). Thanks so much, Mary!!
@losthorizon You are so kind, Beau. Thanks so much. You need to do some selfies again, man. You are very good at them. I still love best the one of you and your wife on the railroad tracks. Blew my mind!:)
@amandal Thanks Amanda. Still rusty with the camera. Funny though, I was just sitting, plucking my guitar to an old tune called "Blue Jean Blues" by Zz Top. Seems like it could make a good photo, just can't think of any good ideas.
My friends, I thank you all so very much for your sweet comments and encouragement. It's amazing to see how many of us share a similar story. I am so glad that it hasn't wrecked me, but served to make me stronger. I appreciate you!
@camim Thanks so much, sweet lady. Hope that you have fun at your school party. You know what, wallflower or no, it doesn't matter. Just love yourself and don't care so much of what others think...you will be fine.:))
Nobody wearing that dress could possibly be mistaken for a wallflower, but your pose, your lighting, and the fabulous color behind you add up to endorse your narrative. So glad you grew out of that stage of being a wallflower.
A mama of 3 should be quite pleased to look so good! I was quite shy when I was young, so some thought I was snobby, but I was really just shy. I rarely dated any of my classmates, always older. Your words well illustrate your photo!
@northy@bobfoto I was all excited to join your mob, and then it went poof before I could. Ah well. I'll be my own mob, too. Every man a mob unto himself.
As a high school teacher, I mentor scores of self-perceived wallflowers.... and it's always fun, just a few years after they get out of high school, to see how they bloom and come into their own.
On another note, I'd really be interested in seeing if there's a majority of introverts on this site. And I'm going to start a discussion to that effect. So there.
@squamloon I'm a raging extravert, but I dabble in being an introvert from time to time. Actually as I age, I become more introverted. Maybe it's that I am home full time and don't get much adult interaction. Strange. Heck, we can form a mob, I was just in a bad mood last week.
@calm Thanks so much, Cathy! I was into the older ones, too. My husband is 5 years older than me and was a crush of mine when I was in middle and high school. He didn't notice me until I was of age.:)
@northy@amandal@squamloon - Sorry Jim, I liked the idea of a mob, I'm a mob kinda guy but I respected Northy's request and suggestion that if a movement was going to happen then Northy would have to excuse herself and return to her peace. Knowing what it takes to keep a group project over the internet together for a whole year with multiple personalities, I understand a little about mob mentality. Respect is paramount. Off to check your post..
@kjbadger One of my goals this year was to capture raw human emotion...really ideally it would be through street photography and candids, but being that I live in suburbia and am home full time, I'm not out on the streets much. So I'm doing it how I can...through the selfies (which was another goal for the year). Thanks so much for your great comments!! What is your name or would you prefer I call you friend or lady?
I missed this while I was away, and caught it on the discussion board. Wow! It is a revealing portrait, with a narrative that matches the tone of the photo. I so admire the intimacy you share and show here. Just lovely.
I went to an all girl Catholic high school, so my experience was very different. I just went to my 40th (yikes) and it was lovely. I was so happy to be there and I felt like everyone that was there was delighted to be there as well.
@anzere03 Glad to teach you the expression. Wish I hadn't lived it, but ah well, I came out the stronger. And kinda glad that I was spared the heartbreak of young stupid love.
That's awesome that he could be goaling today. That is a hard role!!
And I hope you get the house thing sorted soon - stay well. Fav.
I love your expression! It's the one that I have seen in many movies about wallflowers and by 2/3 through the movie I find myself wanting to scream at the lead guy, "For Pete's sake, kiss her!"
Thanks guys!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFYS49IPvAM&feature=share&list=PL4332568D379059F6
Amanda, I appreciate that we were both wallflowers in school. The fact that it probably helped us to retain a heightened sense of innocence (although it felt like ignorance then) makes me almost hope for the same for our kids. Although it was sometimes so painful and frustrating that at the same time I DON"T want the same for our kids. I guess we'll just pray for them, teach them to have some of the necessary skills and qualities to be cool (good hearts, personalities, leadership qualities, sporty, etc.), and let God take care of the rest.
Oh yeah, and FAV too.
@mikeable - nice work Mike.
@snaggy Really appreciate your kind words and fav, Kev!!
@dh Thanks so much for your fav and words, Delena!!
@skipt07 Love your comments, Skip. Thank you so much!
I have never been to a reunion ~ my theory is that if they meant anything to me I would still be in touch anyways ... I am still friends and in contact with a few people from school, the ones who matter to me, the others tbh I am not interested in [harsh but true]
Lovely photo, great dress and you look fantastic..fav :)
@rvwalker I think you are right, Ross. 10 years is not enough time for people (some people anyway) to change and mature. I was the planner for my reunion. Somehow I took it on even though it wasn't my role. I am out of the area now and won't probably be involved with the planning of another. My dad just went to a big year recently...may have been his 50th. He too hung out with his ex girlfriend and my mom. Funny. They had a blast and he really enjoyed seeing his old friends. It had been nearly since high school since he had seen them. Thanks, Ross!! Always appreciate your comments.
@edie Thanks so much, my friend.
@summerfield Hugs to you, my friend. So very kind. Up close you can see the lines on my face and a few wisps of gray, but I am aging pretty well all in all thankfully.
@adamj The reunion wasn't that bad. I was the planner though, and that made it tougher. Some of the same old drama going on, too. People hadn't changed much in 10 years. I will probably go again if there is another someday (I will just not be the one planning that again!). Thanks, friend!
@fauxtography365 I loved it. $15 clearance buy at a department store 10 years ago. I got a great deal. Granted the dye rubs off on me, but...;-) Thanks!
@twr Thanks so much, Timothy!!
@jodimuli Oh I do, my friend. I so appreciate you, Joey. Thank you. And lay off the grass;-).
@vickisfotos It sounds like it was most people's story. Yeah to be done with those days...and to have a dance partner now. Thanks, Vicki!!
@mzzhope It seems that everyone relates in some regard. Wonder why that was so common? Thanks, Hope!
@gozoinklings Really love and appreciate your comments, Catherine!! Thank you!
My friends, I thank you all so very much for your sweet comments and encouragement. It's amazing to see how many of us share a similar story. I am so glad that it hasn't wrecked me, but served to make me stronger. I appreciate you!
As a high school teacher, I mentor scores of self-perceived wallflowers.... and it's always fun, just a few years after they get out of high school, to see how they bloom and come into their own.
On another note, I'd really be interested in seeing if there's a majority of introverts on this site. And I'm going to start a discussion to that effect. So there.
@wendyhgill Aw, thanks so much kind Wendy. You are the best:)! Happy weekend, my friend!
I went to an all girl Catholic high school, so my experience was very different. I just went to my 40th (yikes) and it was lovely. I was so happy to be there and I felt like everyone that was there was delighted to be there as well.