I believe that Photography is a science. It is about stopping time, catching that moment. When I look at a photograph, I am taken back in time to the moment, to the place, and to the people. This retrospective project has been cathartic, it has been therapy, it has been all about a weird world where I lived once.
This is the Hardest Photograph I Ever Took.
Now I could leave now and Dear Reader, you would be saying "What the...? How does this rate as a tough photo, I feel jipped!"
But you get a story too... so sit down, relax, grab a cup of Tea, Coffee, Scotch, Beer, Usain Bolt Energy Drink and read on. We start where I left off yesterday, in the Maroon coloured Hilux which needed push starting with the keys given to me by the lady from the photo on Thursday with Father Austin from the photo on last Sunday and we are cruising through the desolate wasteland that is Loloho. The wharf area of the great Panguna Copper Mine.
The sun is shining. The water is blue, the Meekamui are sitting quiet in the hills, and there is a man on the side of the road trying to hitch a ride. This is not unusual in Papua New Guinea, millions of people do not have vehicles, and hitching a ride is commonplace. In fact, to increase my personal security in some situations, I have picked up hitchhikers, often safer to travel with friendly locals, but you need to be a good judge of character.
Father Austin drives past and he says to me "I know that guy, do you mind if we give him a ride?"
I have complete faith in Father Austin, he has guided me well to date, so I say "Yeah why not..."
We turn around and pull up next to the Commander. Father Austin shakes the Commanders hand and they chat in their Tok Ples, this man is a wantok. What could be wrong? He hops into the back of the Hilux with his daughter. His wife climbs into the tray with her bilum of vegetables.
I introduce myself, and the Commander tells me his story.
When the war started, the Bougainville Revolutionary Army (the BRA) killed everybody, they set fire to villages, they raped, they destroyed. Fuck the mine.
PNG sent in the army, Australia and New Zealand sent their Navy to sit in the blue water and watch from afar. People were slaughtered. Their own people. Bougainvilleans killing Bougainvilleans. Bukans killing Bukans.
But there was resistance. There were Bougainvilleans who liked Rio Tinto, who liked Bougainville Copper, who enjoyed working in the mine, who enjoyed the benefits from a hard day's toil. So these men, found weapons and fought back against the BRA. They wanted to call themselves the Bougainville Resistance Army, but some fuckers had already taken the BRA label.
It was at this moment I thought of the People's Front of Judea, or was that the Judean People's Front?
The Commander continued, it was in a car like this when he was travelling with his son, on a road like this one, on a day like this one when the BRA stepped out onto the road, they came from the sides, and with weapons firing, they decided to kill the Commander. His son was shot in the neck, in the side of the head, in the chest. His son opened up inside the car. The Commander was full of hate. The Commander travelled to Townsville, Queensland, Australia with the PNG Army, the BRA, the Australian and New Zealand Defence and they signed the Peace Treaty.
The Commander is still ready to take up arms.
It was at this moment, that my head was spinning. This man and his story filled me with every emotion that PNG has to offer. His daughter sat upright, with no emotion at all. PNG kids do not do this. They love meeting new people, they love meeting hairy white guys who love a good yarn and who love PNG whether they be Davids or Jasons.
I needed to brighten the mood a little, I needed to smile, I pulled out my camera and asked the Commander and his daughter if I could take their photo. A photo always brings a smile to PNGeans, especially the kids. They love it! It had to be the answer.
So I aimed and focused.
The daughter sitting upright, then sat back and disappeared into the darkness of her father's arm.
I took the shot. No smile, no reaction. Nothing. I had never felt so empty. Photography makes me smile, it makes me giggle like a child, I love capturing that moment. Not today. I showed the screen to the daughter. For 1/1000th of a second she took her eyes away from me and looked at the screen, and then back at me again.
She just sat there in the darkness.
I put my camera away.
We sat in silence.
Outside, the water was still blue.
Photo taken 7 August 2008 somewhere between Loloho and Arawa. Bougainville.
@beckys @tctime - You are more than welcome Becky and TC. At the time I kinda felt that a photo may not have been the right idea, but I was searching for a change of tone, some kind of brevity... my idea failed. :(
@kjarn - This image still sucks the wind out of me.
@myautofocuslife - It is PNG. It is such a bust-up emotional place. It really knows how to lift and how to kick your spirits.
@eudora - It certainly reminds me not to take such things like freedom and safety for granted...
Thanks @jase_h - the above comment is relevant as a response to yours. Secretly at the time, I knew I had stopped time. I felt dull but I knew I had captured a moment. Thanks.
Your story has touched me - I keep going back to the young girl's eyes and they are empty. Any emotion I had, has been sucked out of me. Well written - beautifully composed with the shadows - darkness vs the light - the only light is over the Commando's chest/heart. May he eventually find the peace and the comfort he needs to heal ... and then may he pass it onto to his daughter. Very disturbing - there are so many in similar positions all over the world. My heart aches.
@adifferenteye - Thank you for being here Dar.
dar
@thebluegnu I also see the MONOPOLY man in my head several times when I listen to CD. I have taking photos to put to Mt. Nebo as I see what it means to me.
THANK YOU BOTH SO SO VERY MUCH!!!
dar
dar
For me, the Hardest Photograph You Ever Took is your Hardest Photograph To Look At, as well—and that's a good thing. You bring so much depth and soul to this project—every extreme of the human condition. Thank you. Thank you, thank you.
@adifferenteye Thanks for sharing. I agree with Jason on the Scarborough Fair reference—a very dark Scarborough Fair. Here's a link for any other passersby: http://ethanandtheimaginaryfriends.bandcamp.com/track/mt-nebo @bobfoto