This picture makes me feel a little better after a long day of school and glumness. My day wasn't exactly horrible...well, nothing super horrible happened that is to say... my first day of senior year just wasn't what I expected and it just left me feeling crummy for the school days to come. I have a feeling I will feel differently later... after I get a little more used to things... but it definitely could be better...that's why I'm bummed.
Now you don't have to read this...I just feel like venting. Who better to share my feelings with than my 365 family?? :)
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So today was my first day of senior year. (I think that's already been established, but just reaffirming the fact.) I think the thing I am most bummed about is my schedule... my classes...
here. let me make a list of why I am in the mood I'm in... I think that will be easier.
1) my first two periods are AP courses. for those that don't know, they are honors classes that can give you college credit (correct me Mrs. Smith if I'm wrong)...they are classes a student chooses to take. so yes, I chose them... and the reason is because I want to challenge myself... but they are the FIRST TWO PERIODS OF MY DAY!! really?! okay so not too big of a deal... I'll get them done and over with right?? ...I'm just not looking forward to the butt load amount of hw to come in the future. it's not that I just don't do my work and I hate using my brain (after all why would I sign up for these classes in the first place??)...its that the two classes will be very time consuming.
2) ...that's not to mention my first period, (an AP class), is English. I have always gotten decent grades in english...but reading shakespeare and other works the school requires you to read and writing essays are just NOT things I enjoy doing. I WISH I enjoyed it...but I dont and cant control it. So that's a downer.
3) one more thing about AP. my second period is Calculus. I get so nervous to go to this class because the teacher is so intimidating. I have nothing against her...I had her last year and she can be great at getting you to understand math... but her class is just a class I cant feel comfortable in. I can't even concentrate all the time because she is so strict...I can't be relaxed. She doesn't scare ME enough for me not to go up and ask her a question... but it's pretty sad when ALL of the students feel this way about a teacher. She keeps us in line, I'll give you that... but it'd be nice if she would just lay off a bit haha ...I guess you guys would just have to be a student in her class to understand....
4) all of my classes after these two kinda stink because I am split up from all of my friends... well, good friends lets say. It's just an unfortunate fact I am learning to accept and to deal with, but that's just another little thing that made my day bleh.
5) I chose to take study hall this year. I felt I needed it because I was taking some tough classes and I thought I'd need the time to work. Okay great, but there's almost 70 kids in that class (WAY more than in a normal class just so you know, the study hall room is huge, my other classes contain on avg. maybe 28 kids??) ...so it gets pretty noisy. luckily some will leave to be assistants for other teachers... but I also don't like the room. haha okay that's being a little picky... but it's more of an auditorium setting, the desks are long and connected, and the chairs are so old. Idk... its just not a comfortable working environment...but ehh. I'll live.
6) Lunch. there are 3 lunches at my school. Of course... like every year... I get stuck in 3rd. the reasons 3rd lunch is not as good:
- they run out of food. (only sometimes...but thats rediculous)
- 1st and 2nd lunch have already been there to destroy everything lol
- and of course I'm STARVING by the time it arrives.
I have 3rd lunch for the reason that I'm in choir (which Sunny has always been in with me thank goodness.. so we have lunch together)...but this year, 3rd lunch is different. very few seniors; a ton of under classmen. I like the underclassmen, dont get me wrong. I have nothing against them... its just... we arent with our normal class members... you know what I mean??
7) I couldnt take an art class this year :(( thats just depressing. To me art class was a time to be creative, to take a break from everything school was shoving down our throats...something I enjoyed... but I COULDNT take one this year!!! well, I could if I dropped some classes, but I am making myself take those particular classes to challenge myself and because I will benefit from them. One that is taking place of art this year is Web Design. I WANT to take that class though. Dont know how much I will like it but I'm hoping it will come in handy...
8) Lastly... I signed up for peer tutoring. I help kids with disabilities. I looove helping people and I looooove kids, I'm just saying it wasn't what I expected. I thought I was tutoring kids that were just having trouble in a class! instead I walked into a room full of mentally disabled kids ( poor things :( ) and a very kiddish environment. but you know what....I am going to make it a great class. I WANT to help these kids.... I didnt realize we had so many of them that went to our school... I'm just hoping I can make a difference in their lives and maybe even make a difference in mine.
so that is the end of my complaining about 1st day of senior year lol and yes, maybe I am being a little nit-picky.... but everything added up to an already stressed teenager just didnt make me feel very good, but I feel better that I got that out and shared how I was feeling. I already feel better. I actually just came to the realization that things arent really as bad as they seem...
sorry for the late upload. I STILL have things I need to get done tonight. hopefully I can get well rested before school tomorrow.... I need my rest...
anyways, I took this just a little bit ago. well, more like a few hours ago now, but I was feeling down so I resorted to taking pictures, and this was my favorite that I took tonight. Kind of a quick take/upload, but it's something.
Thanks for stopping by and "listening" to me vent :) or at least looking at my picture. your comments and support mean the world to me even when I can't get on the computer or don't have time to respond to your kindess. Thank you in advance. xoxox. :) :)