Near Death and Some Pretty Flowers

When a guy I know invited me to go take pictures with him at the botanical gardens, I said, "sounds fun." Up in Indy our botanical gardens are indoors surrounded by glass and butterflies that flit from blossom to blossom. I thought that it would be fun to get some shots of the pretty flowers. I get there and it is outside!!! Who had ever heard of a garden outside in nature?!?!?!?

So I am there minding my own business taking pictures and all of the sudden I step and the ground beside my foot moves. It was a freaking snake people! Now before I go into the next bit of this harrowing tale I need to tell you that I am terrified of snakes.

So there I was in the slow motion world where you have just seen a snake next to your foot and realized that it is in fact the largest snake in the Northern Hemisphere and could possibly be related to Godzilla if it had feet, and so I do what any normal person would do. I grabbed the large man that had accompanied me there and literally threw him at the snake. I know I am little but snakes give me She-hulk car flipping strength! I am dead serious when I say that I moved a man almost twice my size and threw him towards the snake. Then I took off screaming and hyperventilating! He gets to where I ran off too and tries to calm me down and walk me up towards the path and I yell at him some very important safety information..."are you kidding me!?!?! We can't walk through the grass!!!! That is where they liiiiiiive!!!!" He managed to get me up to a fenced in area and I sat down shaking and he says, "You threw me at the snake." He said it in disbelief, as if he was slightly offended I had sacrificed him to the snake monster. I calmly replied, "I would throw my own human baby at a snake to get away from it! What don't you understand about me being terrified of snakes? It is nothing personal, I just have a strong will to survive." Well, after that he spent the rest of the time scanning the ground back tot he main area for snakes so he wouldn't be physically assaulted by me fleeing the scene. He later commented that he had seen guys get shot at and remain more calm than that. I responded that unless they were being shot by snakes, there was no comparison.
I think that he learned a lot about life that day but the most important thing was that it is a bad idea to take me into nature and that I have no qualms about sacrificing anyone or anything using my freakish fear fueled strength to get away from a reptile.
I scream a little every time I see a snake and I live in Arizona so that's often!
posted May 9th, 2012  
Wow, that must have been a wild and frightenbing experience for you. You sound lik emy Wife when it comes to spiders. If she sees a spider in the car while driving, even on a 4 lane highway, and I'm in the center (and it doesn't matter if it is so small the human eye can barely see it) she expects me to stop the car immediately, or she threatens to jump out.
posted May 9th, 2012  
you are such a girl, you take that after your mother
posted May 9th, 2012  
@sarasdadandmom Yes, she is a girl too but I can't see mom running from a snake. she is much more brave when it comes to nature than I am, for sure.
posted May 9th, 2012  
@digitalrn lol! Spiders don't bother me but I understand her. If it would be a snake I would have exited the vehicle while it was still moving.
posted May 9th, 2012  
@kerristephens I scream a lot!!! Remind me never to travel to arizona.
posted May 9th, 2012  
I am having a hard time controlling my guffaws, but since my husband is trying to sleep in the next room, I will try to restrain myself. This is the old Sara we know so well from China and Indiana. Glad to know you survived Land of the Killer S****** (Out of respect for you, I am not actually spelling the word.)
posted May 10th, 2012  
Oh, I can SO relate to this story! I have still never seen the Indiana Jones' movies because I heard they had the "s-word" in them. Once, I called the police department while alone at our FL house, because there had been one of those on my porch and I couldn't get inside. Then it disappeared, and I was afraid to go inside cause I didn't see where it went. Don't tell your Dad though, because they actually sent 2 patrol cars and 3 policemen to check every area of my house, even my attic. We have poisonous ones there, and what I described to them by phone sounded like I could be in trouble. That's what I LOVE about law enforcement people. They actually care and respond to a distress call like this one was, rather than just laughing it off. Actually, I'll fess up and tell your Dad myself right now. @sarasdadandmom When they didn't find the snake inside my house, I was relieved, but then I suffered the remorse of having wasted my own taxpayer's money on this house search. I have to say though that I am so afraid of them that I may NEVER have gone back inside my house that trip. I would have been heading to the airport, so I get it! If one is even in a TV commercial, I have to look away fast, and I still shiver. That's unreasonable, yes, but my husband is trained to warn me if he sees one in a movie, before I do, so that I may look away quickly. So, now we are kindred spirits, for sure. The only reason I can hike so much here in Hawaii is that we don't have any of them here. LOL
posted May 15th, 2012  
@sandier Oh dear! I would have had to move!!!! lol
posted May 20th, 2012  
scuz me , but I want to know ,, if you are human. what other kind of baby would you have, if you had one?? I mean , to throw a doll baby at him just doesnt have the same kind of melodramatic ring to it now does it???
posted May 20th, 2012  
When I was a kid, there was a snake trail on the path we walked to school on... yes our mother told us not to walk that path.. but who the hell ever listened to their mother???
Anyways, it was not unusual for us to have to stop on our way to school to let a snake slither by.. made a very convincing argument for when we were late for school . (which was almost everyday )
posted May 20th, 2012  
@nikkers A baby dog, perhaps. I was traumatized and less articulate than normal.

A snake trail? Oh dear, I DO NOT want to know what that is. lol
posted May 20th, 2012  
@sassyinthecity you will be giving birth to a dog?? lol

A snake trail for us was the trail the snakes took to get from Sara's right foot to Sara's left foot...
posted May 20th, 2012  
@nikkers No, but I could have adopted one at the animal shelter and he would then be my own baby dog instead of my own human baby...and at my age that is more likely than a human baby anyway. lol Not funny about the snake trail! =)
posted May 20th, 2012  
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