Bear with me, I am brought to words... (spirituality alert).
Interior, College of Business at Eastern Michigan University. I don't remember all these flags! It's a wonder to see the international business studies program flourishing. The program was brand new back in my day and we didn't have all these flags!
While re-visiting the atrium, which was always a place to pause and reflect in between classes, I humbly admit feeling a twinge of pride in myself for taking the risk all those years ago and joining in this community of entrepreneurial spirits.
The decision to follow my heart and complete my business degree cost me dearly in relationships and emotional health. It was a novel concept in my circle of family and friends. I lost a husband to divorce, friends, co-workers, and siblings. I graduated, and was crushed in spirit.
Perhaps I was following my dream for the wrong reason? I gave up. I focused on a new family and new relationships, including a new one with God. It took me 28 years to return to this spot; something I had tried previously, but ended up driving home in tears at the sight of the water tower (previously posted).
This trip back years later thankfully, was different. My #1 was with me, Terry. He has been my most ardent cheerleader and supporter since we were teens. He never thought I was crazy (or at least never said it to my face). He still indulges me by listening to my fantasies of business ventures and travel. And he is my husband of almost 25 years. I'm happy to include him in a part of my life I had closed off. Specifically, this shot reminds me my passions, buried deep for safekeeping, are still quite alive and well. It reminds me why I went to college in the first place. Why I took the risk to make a different, hopefully better, life for myself.
My career role today seems teeny-tiny in comparison to what I dreamed about and envisioned for myself. I am but a humble office manager. Instead of travel, I've been rather stationery. Instead of conducting business deals, I'm supporting those who conduct business deals. For a long time, I've thought of this as failure. Not reaching my potential.
It turns out, I did not fail, or lose, as much as I thought, and I am still filled with potential. I am involved in the day to day operations of a regional group, which is part of a larger global corporation. The best part, all of the international travelers come to us! What drove me in the past, entrepreneurial spirit and close relationships with all kinds of people, have remained. It just looks much different than I imagined.
I got into photography as a hobby. My goal: Find beauty in the everyday, in the craziest possible places. Urban decay spoke to my broken heart. I did not expect to find beauty in myself or in my own common life, but it's there.
I couldn't sleep last night. I kept wondering if I should share my story. I hope it's here for the person who needs to hear it. It's meant to be encouraging. It's sad in some parts, but it's also beautiful.
As much as my ego would like to take credit for all the amazing thoughts, feelings, ideas, and words going through my mind, my spirit knows better. The photographic journey is a spiritual one for me. When I'm focusing on a subject, I feel connected to God, free-ish from distractions. God gave me the heart of an artist. I love beauty and all forms of creativity. Apparently I'm supposed to share "my light" with the world so you can know God too. I'm so uncomfortable doing so. It doesn't come easy to share deep feelings, thoughts, or God with anyone. I was taught God is a private matter. I'm much more comfortable in "head" situations like business, than I am with "heart" situations like expressing love. Since my story was keeping me awake last night, I thought perhaps I better listen to the Lord, and speak up.
Who knew a photo challenge could bring such awareness. And so many words?
