There was a most peculiar kid in our town
Was always late for school
He never learned to tell a verb from a noun
And always broke the rule
They looked upon him as a clown
yet he wasn't such a fool
Puddin' head Jones was fat and funny
Dumber than sticks and stones
That's why the kids all called him
Wooden head Puddin' head Jones
He couldn't spell Constantinople
Didn't know beans from bones
Pencils and books were never made for him
Woodenhead puddin' head Jones
The teacher told his mother she'd take him right in hand
And teach him a thing or two
Like his older brother he began to understand
He learned everything she knew
All the kids to the teacher carried
Candy and ice cream cones
But who do you think the teacher married
Wooden head Puddin' head Jones
His spelling was bad as spelling could be
He spelled cat with a K
He saw that he and the teacher could not agree
So he threw his books away
He was only wasting his time he said
So he got a job instead
Puddin' head Jones was fat and funny
Dumber than sticks and stones
That's why the kids all called him
Wooden head Puddin' head Jones
He couldn't spell Constantinople
Didn't know beans from bones
Pencils and books were never made for
Wooden head Puddin' head Jones
After he got married he went out and got a job
And kept at it night and day
Money stuck to him like corn on a cob
Never spent it in a cabaret
Stock market crashed then came the depression
Bankers cut down their loans
But who do you think had all the money
Wooden head Puddin; head Jones
