Today’s been one of those days where in some ways I just look at my life and don’t know whether to laugh or scream about the ridiculousness of things that life sometimes likes to throw at me. Life continues to lob lemons at me with some force. But rather than dwelling on it, I thought I might jot down some things I’m proud of, because I saw this patch on my desk tonight and it inspired me and also I feel like actually I do have quite a bit to be proud of at the moment:
• I have now been out of hospital for a whole two weeks and not skipped a single bit of my meal plan.
• I spoke to my GP this morning about something that I’ve avoided speaking to anyone medical about for manyyyyyyyy years. I don’t know why I avoided it because in the end it was super helpful.
• I also spoke to her about something else that I’ve been trying to talk to medical people about for weeks/months, but was always worried about them doubting my intentions/thinking I was making it up.
• I spoke to her about a couple of other things too, and I’m glad I did because it helped us to make some links and hopefully begin to come up with some solutions.
• I alsooooo mentioned to her about how anxious I get about being weighed, and she’s going to speak to the HCA for me so that she’s aware, because I tried to have that conversation with her last week and struggled with it. This was really hard to do, but she’s going to speak to the HCA and let her know which is a relief.
• She said that I’m coping with a LOT right now but I’ve not engaged in any ED behaviours, or any other damaging behaviours, so yay!!!
• I made a grand total of 3 phone calls today which I’d been putting off – wahay.
• I tried to make a 4th but couldn’t get through.
• Lucky is slowly learning to trust me and we’re beginning to understand each other and I’m really proud of that.
• I’ve survived my 3rd day of my NHS job.
• I’m learning to be open and honest with health professionals and my friends, and to reach out to people when I need to.
• I’m learning to advocate for myself and be assertive with my needs.
• I’ve put some healthy boundaries in with both my jobs, and I’m learning to flex, too.
• I’ve been keeping up with some self-care that I find really hard to do, more often than not (sleeping, waking up, getting dressed, washing my hair, replying to people, etc.).
• Despite everything that life has thrown at me in the last two weeks (and before), I’m continuing. I’m getting up, showing up, and not giving up.
• I’m still growing!
(Patch is from The Blurt Foundation:
https://www.blurtitout.org/ Created by the lovely Stacie Swift:
https://www.stacieswift.com/)
@overalvandaan thank you!
@helenhall hank you so much x
@pyrrhula I LOVE that, thank you!
@olivetreeann Thank you much :) Yes, I think we should grow all of our lives x
@lynnz Thank you, that means a lot x
@thank you so so much x
@craftymeg Thank you! X