Hey!!! The light breeze BLEW ME OVER again and my monkey ball friend here can't help me up! DO YOU MIND?! Which reminds me... Ya know I had some time to get a good look at myself in the mirror yesterday and for you gals who are so dissatisfied with your features... Let me point out some of mine!
1. Who decided my head should be almost 3 times the size of my torso?! If your head was this out of proportion with the rest of your body - you couldn't hold it up! You'd literally break your neck if you had to do a double take!
2. My eyes? Good grief! My eyes are so dang big that my peripheral vision makes it almost possible to see what's directly behind me!
3. Lips? Lets talk about my lips! Real models with full and luscious lips have more space between their upper lip and their nose, and their lower lip and their chin… I can swallow my face with my big mouth! Another thing… put your hand up to your face! How much of your face does your hand cover? Hmmm? Now look at mine!!! You've heard of folks that can put their fist in their mouth? Well, I can put both of my very small hands - up to the elbows in my great big mouth!
4. My nose? It's so durn small that I can't get enough oxygen for my GREAT BIG head which would imply a GREAT BIG brain but, believe me… it's empty in there! Just a hollow hulkin' sphere full of air!
5. My ears? Too small to mention. Just don't expect me to hear a thing!
6. Now on to you gals who complain about your big feet... My feet are as big as freakin' battle ships when compared to my body and the shoes they stuck on me make 'em look like frickin' oil tankers! Imagine bricks with tooth picks for legs!!! Either way, if you had a head and feet like mine, one uncalculated false move on your part and your head or feet could kill ya!
7. I can't even bend at my knees or hips! How am I supposed to sit down?! I'm on my feet all the time, unless I get knocked over by a light breeze or the slightest bump to whatever I'm standing on which is not hard to do - as you can plainly see! I might weigh a whole ounce and 98 percent of that is my HUGE HULKIN' head and feet!
8. Funky Fashion? I've got this horrible, stupid, red plastic cowboy hat glued to my GIGANTIC head which makes it impossible to take it off and comfortably lie down! They could've given me a more "fashionable" style of a cowboy hat like a Stetson or a Resistol. Worst of all... I can never get naked to take a bath or change my clothes! They're permanently part of my teeny tiny body! They did give me an ugly styled coat - right out of the 60s or 70s - the only thing I can take off.
Ugh! And Barbie complained because they made her more PC with smaller boobs and bigger hips! So, you'll just have to excuse me for my sarcastic mood and humor in this pic! I just had to get that off my chest! Whew! Just 3 more days to go with this challenge and a good thing I work real cheap!
Aww . . poor Cloe! The more I see her the more I love her. This could become a short story! Heartwarming for women to see other women's imperfections . . and she even points them out. Can't wait for the next episode. :)
@karenann LOL! Thank you for your thoughtful comments, gal! I believe I have the last 3 days all planned out. =) Hopefully, not what too many will be expecting.
Hahahah! I just LOVE your rant!! You're so funny Maggie! This poor little doll~ just knowing all the horrible things wrong with her...well it just makes me feel better about my own self-image :D Thanks Maggie Mae- sorry Cloe! Cute shot!
I am absolutely cracking up over your caption! I love the creativity around this SSC challenge - both your photography and storytelling. Awesome stuff!
@heidievans73 Happy to hear it, Heidi! Wasn't too sure anyone would see the sarcastic humor of it! So glad you did! Thank you for your comments and support through this little challenge! I very much appreciate it! =)
Cloe, now listen here gal, all young girls have issues with their figure and looks. All your admirers on 365 know you are a very pretty girl and I bet most of the men who folllow your big sister Maggie would love to take you out on a date ! OK so some might prefer your sis to you, but you have a big fan base on here, so don't have issues with your figure :)...plus any gurl who keeps her cowgirl hat on when being swept off her feet deserves good street cred !
Maggie, this is an impressive day 4 in the Cloe series :) ....great photo and an equally impressive narrative (or is it a rant !!)
@phil_howcroft LOL! Cloe says thank you, Phil and send her regards to Nottingham! You are too kind and sweet with your compliments! Oh my! Making me blush and I think I'm too old for that! Ha ha! "Street Cred" - I like that! Thank you so much for your comments and support with this little challenge! You don't know how much Cloe and I appreciate it! =) I do believe it was a rant... Heh!
@marlboromaam Maggie, LOL, it's good to have comment on here with you and Cloe.......sorry about making you 'blush'....you are still a young woman Maggie..50 something is the new 40 (or something like that !!).
@phil_howcroft No apology necessary for the blush thing! And, yes! Your comments have made 365 much more fun, fella! =) Now I really don't know about 50 something being the new 40 something. LOL! I would love to relive my last 15 years cause I sure would do it differently! Wouldn't "do-overs" for life be wonderful?!!
@deburahiru Yes, she does need some cowboy boots but, unfortunately, her ugly shoes are part of her body as you can see by the previous photos. 3 more days to go with this series challenge and I'll be glad when it's over! Thank you for your comments and your support!
@marlboromaam Maggie 'do-overs' would be great...especially if we had the wisdom we have now.....OK maybe not wisdom, maybe the life skills we have learnt through experience...to help us make the right call / decision....oooh err that was very profound for me....almost wisdom :)
@alexwhiteman God help us! Our society has run amuck! When you set out to try to please everybody, you end up pleasing no one and this sort of thing just continues to perpetuate the worst in people. WOW! Thanks for sharing that and thank you for your comments!
@myautofocuslife I promise there won't be near as much writing on the last 3 pics, Livia! LOL! Thank you for your lovely comments! Appreciate it more than you know!
@simonesta Thank you for your comment, Simonetta! And I honestly don't know what happened! I did not delete my comment. I wouldn't do that to you! I had no reason to delete my comment!
@simonesta No ma'am! You said nothing wrong! I really don't know what happened. I promise you I wouldn't have deleted my comment. Honestly! I am sorry if you thought I did. I am puzzled as to how it even happened? If I had any sort of problem with someone, I'd say something! Really, gal! Please don't think you did a thing!
Great photo and talking points. BTW I like to buy my boots & hats at the Justin outlet store in Ft Worth: none of that Stetson or Resistol gear for me.
Maggie, this is an impressive day 4 in the Cloe series :) ....great photo and an equally impressive narrative (or is it a rant !!)
http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/health/2012/01/18/american-cancer-society-blogger-apologizes-for-bald-barbie-flub/
We are all flawed...
Thanks - I needed a chuckle :)
Cheers...