no need to comment on this one thanks - purely a diary shot.
About a month ago we went up to my Husband's home town of Doncaster to take his mother out for lunch to celebrate her 80th birthday. She was unusually cheerful all day, seemingly relishing being with both of her sons, her four grandchildren and her one great-grandchild.
After the meal we took her home to the house where she has lived for over fifty years, and where Graham was born. While there I went upstairs to the loo and was struck by the sign on her bedroom door. It was one of those porcelain signs that were common souvenirs from British seaside towns, and they always make me think of the 1970's. I imagine she bought it while on one of her frequent Sunday 'runs out' in the car to Bridlington or Skegness with her husband Ray. Ray died in 2012 and the poignancy of this sign still being on the door over a year later struck me at the time.
I wasn't expecting to be back at her house quite so soon, but here I was, today (17th March) waiting to leave the house to accompany my husband's mother on her final journey - to her funeral. In the meantime she had become very ill, very suddenly and passed away.
I am not going to pretend that she was the easiest person in the world, she wasn't, and my husband and his brother had very difficult relationships with her following the death of their father when my husband was 12. But, she was their mother, and will be missed.
The funeral was a very small affair, and I have to say I was so proud of my boys (including my husband.) Graham and Angus helped to carry the coffin and Sam, who had never been to a funeral before coped very well. A sad day.
That brings back memories - that sign is just like one that I had on my door as a teenager in the 70s, though mine had my name on it. When we moved to England it was one of the first things I unpacked on my first evening in this strange new home - and found it had broken.
Difficult or not, as you say, she was their mother and she will be missed. And I'm sorry, because for all the strain and unhappiness, very few relationships are all bad and there will be times when she is missed for the person she was at her best.
I think I had one of those when I was young, or its just very familiar from the times. How nice that you had a lovely day together with her just before she died, almost like she knew it would be the last time and she had to make an effort - who knows.
A very poignant tale Jan. A sign I too remember well....pretty sure Cathy had one of these on her bedroom door as a child.
What a lovely day your MIL had on her birthday & all will feel so glad they made the effort on the day. Sounds like she had a a fairly active life up until the last month....you can't ask for more that one should go quickly at the end.. My MIl was a very difficult woman but a mum is a mum & she will be sadly missed. You do remember the better times when they are gone.
So sorry for your family's loss. So nice that you had such a nice day with her then and that she went quickly is sometimes a blessing, if somewhat a shock.
This is so nostalgic for me. My brother, two sisters and I all had these name plates on our bedroom doors as children. Lovely to hear that your MIL had a good day with her whole family around her before she died xx
March 27th, 2014
Leave a Comment
Sign up for a free account or Sign in to post a comment.
Difficult or not, as you say, she was their mother and she will be missed. And I'm sorry, because for all the strain and unhappiness, very few relationships are all bad and there will be times when she is missed for the person she was at her best.
What a lovely day your MIL had on her birthday & all will feel so glad they made the effort on the day. Sounds like she had a a fairly active life up until the last month....you can't ask for more that one should go quickly at the end.. My MIl was a very difficult woman but a mum is a mum & she will be sadly missed. You do remember the better times when they are gone.