An email from the charity Bipolar UK just popped through to remind me that today is Bipolar Awareness Day.
So, as I did last year, I thought I'd stand up and be counted (Well I guess I have already from time to time) and say what it means to me.
And what I will say is basically the same as I said last year except that I have now been out of hospital for 13, not 12 years:
It's not a celebrity 'disease'.
It doesn't feel shameful now it's not called manic depression.
Bizarre that some folk have still not heard of it.
It was good to find out my diagnosis 30+ years after my first hospitalized episode aged 19.
It has been even better to be able to understand what it means and to work out a self-management plan for life to keep well.
The last time I was ill and hospitalized is now 13+ years ago.
I do have times when I feel not so good but everybody has those times for various reasons and at least now I know what to do about them.
If I had known my diagnosis sooner I might not have enjoyed a teaching career started late in life and lasting 13 years.
From Bipolar UK's email: 'More than one million people have bipolar in the UK. It's a severe, life-long mental illness with treatment hampered by misdiagnosis, misunderstanding and stigma."
I personally think that's a bit pessimistic but they are fund-raising and I'll be giving them the charity donation which we make each Christmas now instead of sending out cards.
Last year I posted an orange gerbera with my text but this year here's Ray: without being sentimental or soppy, I can't imagine where I would be without him.
Well done Hazel! I know I have commented to you about this before but from one who knows, congratulations and I too have my 'Ray' who has brought me through. Best wishes
Well done Hazel ! I admire your honesty in recognising your illness and for having a positive attitude , with of course the love and support of Ray -- A beautiful portrait , and not of a stranger this time !
Thank you for sharing, Hazel. Our daughter is bi-polar and only now that she has been correctly diagnosed (rather than misdiagnosed - its been a tough few years!) can she really get on with her life and her career. We understand and we wish you and Ray well. We appreciate your bravery and your attitude is wonderful
Thank you so much for sharing your story. Its terrible how much mental illness is unfairly stigmatized but the more people talk about it the more others can learn. I hope one day people as a whole are much more understanding.
So good that you are vocal about your experiences. It's not that long ago this illness would never be mentioned, things improving now but still not good enough. So important to have a good partner to encourage, love & support you in the hard times. My daughter hasn't got bipolar but suffered from Postnatal depression which still hangs on now & again, the latest spell just recently. I know how hard it is to get through such times & all the support is vital.
Lovely photo of your 'rock' Ray, I can always feel the bond between you through the airwaves!
Oh, Hazel. Thank you for sharing your story, and for raising awareness! For each person who has shared their diagnosis with the world, it helps the rest of the world understand more. And to post a lovely portrait of your main support is perfectly appropriate! Hi, Ray!
Thank you so much for posting about this. Invisible illnesses can be such a difficult and uphill climb to overcome. I am thrilled you have found your way to support and healing! A nice portrait tribute to acknowledge the supporters!
A lovely happy capture of Ray. It can't have been easy for you both but pleased you are doing so well now with the support of Ray and your own awareness I am sure it has made you both stronger in life and love.
hazel, thank you for your comments on my buttons photo yesterday. i appreciate your frankness about your condition, and as everyone here has expressed, kudos to you for your bravery in facing it head on, and for having such a great support in your life. i think that treatment, willingness to undergo treatment, as well as solid support, all in equal amount, are key towards getting this condition or disease in control. and thank you for educating us about this condition/disease (the professionals i've encountered refer to it as disease, but i think that referring to it as a disease is what put the unintended stigma to it. enlighten me, please.) :-)
Thank you for your comment. I think calling it manic depression is what attracted stigma, plus the fact that not many people really understood it. Bipolar disorder sounds less threatening, I think. I had my first breakdown aged 19 & found out what 'IT' was called aged 53 so it was good to know what to research and find out how to confront it!
Thank you everybody for your response to this post. Knowing is indeed the first step to managing some control over bipolar and 34 years was really way too long for me to wait to know its name! A common thread in your comments is the need for folk to stand up and be counted. That was hard for me to do at first but now I don't mind who knows that I have bipolar although it's not the first thing I tell anybody I meet as I don't want to be defined by it. But it can't be ignored and if everyone who manages to live a good life in spite of it discloses that fact, that surely that helps to lessen the stigma of so-called {that's another story} mental illness. I could say a lot more but I'll just mention that 365 is now part of my self-management plan and for me is a treat every day!
Hazel, you are wonderful to be so open about your bi polar. I've struggled hugely with mental health issues this near including a breakdown in February and am now fighting anorexia.
Sarah, thank you for your comment. I'm very sorry to hear you had a breakdown this year and about anorexia. I do not know much about the latter but understand it is much more closely linked to mental health issues than folk generally realise. I have had several breakdowns in my life, all of them requiring hospitalization and taking a long time to recover from once out of hospital. After my mother died, I was ill and in and out of the psychiatric ward for nearly two years. For me the clue to keeping well is to live day to day as far as absolutely possible, taking into account 'mundane' factors such as getting enough sleep, eating properly, not doing too much and many other details which I have on a mindmap plan which I made for myself. If you ever wanted to be in touch further with me, I'll put my email up somewhere on your page but I never want to intrude into others' lives.
@quietpurplehaze wouldn't dream of ignoring Hazel, thank you for your time. Have to say, I am just starting to have better days, but what has kept me going through some very dark times, is the riverbanks and being out in nature generally with my camera
You are so lucky to have such a wonderful man by your side. A big hug to both of you.
Lovely photo of your 'rock' Ray, I can always feel the bond between you through the airwaves!
Great rembrance for this illness. Knowing is often ,and sure the first step, of accepting.
Nice photo
Thank you for your comment. I think calling it manic depression is what attracted stigma, plus the fact that not many people really understood it. Bipolar disorder sounds less threatening, I think. I had my first breakdown aged 19 & found out what 'IT' was called aged 53 so it was good to know what to research and find out how to confront it!
Thank you & I am so glad that you also have the support that you need.
Many thanks for your comment both on the image and my story.
Thank you so much for comforting words of support.
Babs, thank you for your comments and we both enjoyed the hug!!
Many thanks for the vote of confidence, means a lot.
Helen, such lovely and heartfelt comments, thank you. I wish your daughter well and hope for a bright future for her.
@claycameras @happypat @jyokota @seattlite @kandkids @cathieg @pyrrhula @pcoulson @jaffacakes @phil_howcroft @wendyfrost
I'm sure you do feel the same way about Alzheimer's, Sylvia. I hope that you are feeling gradually more settled in life.
Sarah, thank you for your comment. I'm very sorry to hear you had a breakdown this year and about anorexia. I do not know much about the latter but understand it is much more closely linked to mental health issues than folk generally realise. I have had several breakdowns in my life, all of them requiring hospitalization and taking a long time to recover from once out of hospital. After my mother died, I was ill and in and out of the psychiatric ward for nearly two years. For me the clue to keeping well is to live day to day as far as absolutely possible, taking into account 'mundane' factors such as getting enough sleep, eating properly, not doing too much and many other details which I have on a mindmap plan which I made for myself. If you ever wanted to be in touch further with me, I'll put my email up somewhere on your page but I never want to intrude into others' lives.
ps. Didn't realize I'd written so much - please ignore if it you so wish!!
Yes, agree, the photography is key - and you have some amazing shots!