I could write a whole book on the drawbacks of all your friends being women. But today I will just talk about one specific complaint. In Taiwan there is this belief that women should not eat cold food, especially when they are having their period. I have long given up the debate on this, especially since it’s not my body, however there are times when this belief still hurts me. These times are known was “coldstone coupon time.”
Pictured above is a little sheet from 7-11 and each time you buy something you get a special little sticker. Collect enough stickers and you can have some deals around town. I usually go for the buy one get one free deal at coldstone. I then tell my friends that I have some coupons and they say “yay! Wait for me, let’s have it on _____day.” Then that day comes, and they say “oh sorry I can’t go, my period came.”
This happens a lot. A whole lot. Which makes me think that coldstone coupons could be a great form of birth control. Worried that you are pregnant? Just make a plan to have coldstone with me and your period will come right away.
Usually if I have three coupons, I’ll be lucky to use even one. Why not just have it again with that one person? Well that’s another drawback of female friends. In their own words “I want it, but I can’t have it again, I will get too fat.”
For the sake of this post, I would like you to ignore the fact that it's always my friends who give me the coupons in the first place. It doesn't fit the narrative. Or perhaps they are so diabolical that they give me the coupons just to see me suffer not being able to actually use them.
Now I don’t want anybody reading this to get the wrong idea. This post is not a complaint about women. I admire women, and how they have to work so much harder to get through such an unfair world. I'm not saying that I dislike women. I'm saying that I hate my friends.
