The year was...1986 or maybe it was 1985. It was whatever year that I was in the fourth grade. The last day of school before Christmas break.
I remember this day pretty clearly even close to 30 years later...because...I remember how embarrassed I was that day.
Because, you see... I was the only girl in my class who got a Christmas gift from a boy that year. And kids kept teasing me the rest of the year about my "boyfriend" and how we were gonna get married and have kids. I hated it. At 9 years old, it felt like such a big deal.
(I would find out later that most people knew this was coming and that even my older sister in the 6th grade knew about it because the boy's older brother was her classmate and told her about it.)
To me, the worst part of it all...in the moment, that is, is that I didn't like this boy back and I felt weird and awkward and didn't know how to respond to this gesture. Plus, it was the way he presented the gift to me.
So, in the days leading up to Christmas, I remember there were murmurings among the 4th grade rumor mill of this boy buying a gift for his "new girlfriend," that he was getting her something special. I remember thinking how embarrassing it was gonna be for the girl who was going to get this gift.
I was clueless that he liked me. Sometimes, I still believe I have a degree of cluelessness in those matters even now, as I'm never quite sure when a dude likes me or is hitting on me. I just think they're being friendly.
But, anyway. The day came and he presented the gift to me in the morning in front of EVERYONE and dropped it on my desk, saying "Merry Christmas, T." His face was bright red and he was mumbling.
Everyone in class was all, "oooooh T's got a boyfriend" and singing that stupid song about him and me, being up in a tree and k-i-s-s-i-n-g. I was humiliated. Frozen. I couldn't even open up the gift. I don't even think I said thank you as I stuffed the small wrapped package in my desk as the teacher begun her lessons for the day.
I remember I felt like crying when another boy -- the one that most of the girls thought was THE CUTEST, including me -- came up to me later at lunch and said, "Why don't you open his gift?"
It was like a stab in my little 9 year old heart. I actually never opened the gift and left it in my desk for the remainder of the year.
In retrospect, the true worst part of it all, was that I was too young to appreciate this boy's genuine and sincere token of affection, that he honestly just liked me and wanted to get me something he thought I liked, that this was the first gesture of a boy just having a simple crush... See, I wasn't one of those girls who were precocious and developed early. None of that. He just liked me. Maybe he dug my bowl-shaped hairdo. I dunno. But he had no agenda of getting into a girls pants. It was innocent. Sweet. Two things that, in the teenage and adult years of dating that would later be in store for me, was rarer.
I think the second worst thing about it...was probably how I made that boy feel. How it probably took a lot of guts and I didn't even acknowledge it. Looking back, I felt really bad.
Now. Fast forward about 4 years later... In the 8th grade when we were all graduating junior high to go to high school. I remember the kid writing in my year book something to the effect of: "Sorry for humiliating you back in 4th grade."
I felt so bad. He was apologizing to ME for something nice he did?? It was the other way around. I was sorry...
Anyway, every now and then I think of that Christmas and smile because it was a lesson for me... About humility and being gracious and being unafraid to tell someone how you feel. And how... It's not really about the actual gift this time of year... It is truly the thought behind it that is precious.
...
I don't know where I was going with that story.
I guess my point after all this rambling is...I wish you all Happy Holiday during this time of year. And I hope you all appreciate the gifts you receive this year - big or small!
Love the image which is colourful and crisply captured. Yes !! I did read through your story and I'm amazed that you can recall all that detail. I'm one of the 'Bahh Humbug Brigade' but still feel it is proper to wish everyone Merry Christmas. Even though I think it has become a major marketing exercise. Have a great day.
@tonydebont merry Christmas, Tony! Thank you for your lovely comment. I don't like the commercialism of this holiday either and my family and I actuallu no longer exchange gifts. Also thanks for reading my story. I'm not around here much anymore so I have lost that sense of community here. I don't have the energy to invest time and attention like I did last year so I have lost that cameraderie. But that is what happens here on 365 - love it or leave it. Will miss people like you when I leave after my 500th pic. Happy holidays to you and your family and I wish you a happy new year too!
@fauxtography365 Ms T. I'll miss you and your quirky selfies but it is as you say the nature of this site. Drop in any time and just leave me a comment. We're heading off on a 49 day South America cruise next month, you may want to drop in and see some of what I see. It has certainly been a lot of fun.
Merry post christmas! :)
I cant stand the commercialism of the holidays either.
Nice bit of personal history, you could be a writer. I was once told buy a teacher some of the best writing is personal.
Will miss your uniqueness on this site when your done.
@zosimasy thanks, Charles! I've enjoyed following you. Appreciate all your comments as well. I was also told by a teacher that a good writer writes about what they know, something personal. I try :) happy holidays to you too!
@baznman hey Baz! Happy New Year to you too! So what he gave me? So I actually didn't actually open it until I took it out of my desk at the end of the school year (in June). I had kinda been dying to know what it was. Rumor was they were earrings. He had even hinted at that as well. BUT....they totally weren't earrings. I can see how he thought they might be when he bought them... They looked like them as they lay in the box. When I took them out and turned them over... They were actually cufflinks lol. And pretty much useless to a 9-year old girl. But it's the thought that counts and his was sincere.
@fauxtography365 Now that, is funny! You're right though, it is the thought that counts. It probably was better that you didn't open the then, because everyone would have found out he bought you the wrong gift and my have just wound up humiliated.
January 1st, 2015
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I cant stand the commercialism of the holidays either.
Nice bit of personal history, you could be a writer. I was once told buy a teacher some of the best writing is personal.
Will miss your uniqueness on this site when your done.
But why did you leave us hanging... What was in the box?!?