I sometimes sit quietly to meditate and seriously consider my place in the universe, and my significance in the grand scheme of things..... And in those moments of peace, tranquility and understanding, I am always overcome by the urge to write my name large in gasoline and set that shit on fire.
I've studied the works of many of the great philosophers and wise men of the past and have concluded that some of it is enlightening, some of it is just common sense and the rest of it is just mind games, nonsense and piffle. Oh..... and Buddha is just a smug, self satisfied fat git.