"Her hair of floating sky is shimmering,
glimmering in the sun
Julia, Julia
Morning moon, touch me,
So I sing a song of love, Julia."
(Lennon, from the album "The Beatles" a.k.a. the White Album, 1968)
Julia is the only song written entirely by John Lennon during his 'beatles' days. He recorded it live with an acoustic guitar, finger-picking the chords, a style he learned from psychedelic singer Donovan Leitch while in India. He wrote and dedicated the song to Yoko Ono and his mother Julia who died in a car accident when he was just a teenager; just when he had started to have a close relationship with her around that time.
-o0o-
i took a picture of my mother's picture. my father took this photo when i was 7 and my mother would have been 27 at the time. i remember we had this kodak camera that he would hold against his chest; then he would develop the pictures at night by putting a bed sheet over the dining table and his dark room would be underneath the table. he'd turn off the light while we sat on one corner (our house was a one room affair) eagerly waiting for the pictures to develop. a lot of those pictures had been lost except for this one. my brother gave this to me several years ago.
i always wanted to look like her - i took my looks from my father. she had beautiful curly hair and her beautiful face was framed by a widow's tear (or is that widow's peak?); she had these big brown eyes with thick curly lashes. her skin was like delicate porcelain, smooth and creamy. she and my father were opposites: whereas he was tall, lean and dark, she was short, pudgy and fair-skinned.
she had a hard life, grew up dirt poor, daughter of farmers, and her father died when she was a young girl. her mother remarried during the war and she was left at an early age at home to take care of the household and her youngest baby sister at barely the age of ten, while all her older siblings worked the fields. in those days, they get out of poverty by getting married, but they just created the same situation for themselves. she always cried whenever i get beaten up, would beg me to just obey; i always questioned my father's decisions, especially when it comes to punishing me :-) a few months before she died, my father and i had a row. the next day she told me she admired me for standing up to my father, but that i should understand that he grew up without a family and that he was not as educated as i was. she died when i was 21, had she lived, i would have been the 'good girl', would have married, had kids, be subservient to the husband, which she herself knew would not happen. after she was gone, there was no need for me to be a good girl and i followed what my heart and mind had set to do. she would not have approved, but she'd be happy that i've chosen to be me. she's been gone 37 years and i still miss her everyday.
How brave of you to share this raw story with us.Times were sure different in our parents era and we hopefully learn from observing. Lovely photo. I am sure she is watching over you in your life now and understands your choices.
What a beautiful photo to have. A different time and different place in life. She did what was right for her, as did you. As Pam mentioned, she understands and is proud of you.
@danig@pamfromcalgary@sunnygreenwood - thank you very much, lovely ladies. the choice of "julia" was last minute. i listened to the beatles' J songs and there was just something about this one that touched me. i knew from reading that julia was the name of john lennon's mother but looking up the history of this song and reading the write up on wikipedia about his mother bolted me out of my silly senses and made me think more of my mother.
i've been writing a novel based on my parent's experiences but i realize that while i could write and romanticize my father's experiences, i have been reluctant to write about my mother. it is not of course that i don't want to write about her, in fact i really do. but every time i get into it, i get depressed and i just cry, perhaps because i feel i cannot bring into paper and give justice to the hardship she had experienced and i feel guilty that she died not knowing how it was to have "a little something" and enjoy a few pleasures, as i had just started working around that time. i remember she cried when i gave her my entire first pay and told her to take care of it for me.
Incredible story, Summerfield. I can relate. I am so much like you. You're mother is beautiful . .reminds me of my mother. This is just a great photo and remembrance. Lovely.
what a beautiful memory you have of this picture. I loved reading your story about your younger years with your mom and dad. I think you could write your own book, it would be a very good read I'm sure! This story touched my heart =)
Great photo to have and goes well with the song choice. We are who we are because of where we have been and how we learned from it. Some would have done as they felt was expected and some as they felt was necessary. Glad you broke a cycle.
Thanks for sharing your story - it hits the heart. I'm sorry she past so early - but glad you followed your heart. Life is so short we have to follow our own way.
@karenann - thank you, karenann. in the collage yesterday, her close up photo is the one in the right upper corner. she was 17 in there and already had 3 pregnancies. a child having children, hard to believe.
@steeler - in my extended family, too, we have a lot of julia and julie. but this song was not one of popular beatles tune growing up in the old country. but i love the sentiment that john lennon wanted to convey in that song. thank you, howard. i always appreciate your comments, and glad that your dad's okay now.
@roth - thank you, sue. the story is being written, but you will have to wait a few more years, hopefully just a few, to read the whole thing. :-)
@bkbinthecity - it was quite an experience growing up. i guess i took after my father - he was a jack of all trades but master of none. he had a lot of talents, knew a lot of things and how to do them just by reading. he did not finish grade six and my mother didn't finish grade four, i guess that was why they inculcated in our minds about the importance of education. thank you.
@jannkc - thank you, jann. my sentiments exactly. my father didn't want me to continue my studies after high school, despite two scholarships to university. but i insisted on going to college, taking something at least, far from washing clothes or selling at the market. not that i looked down on those, but i felt i have enough smarts to make it through university. i thought if i can have a good job, i can help the rest of my siblings to get a better education, and then maybe have a better life. mission accomplished.
@russianblue - thank you, kass. following one's will, of course, does not come easy. there were a lot i also had to give up, but all in all, i'd do things all over again, except for a thing or two.
(back home, so I missed seeing your post yesterday) -- when I saw this beautiful picture -- I thought the woman was YOU!!!!!!!!! Her beautiful face is YOU!!! Her eyes -- it's YOU!!! I hope you can tell her story -- it'll be heartbreaking and gut-wrenching -- but it needs to be told. That's why it's so hard. You have an amazing story, that's clear. Thank you for sharing the picture, the story -- you are amazing!!
@cscecil - thank you so much, sue. the big girl in the photo is me, with violet in my lips as i was prone to canker sores when i was growing up, prelude to the anemic teenager i was to become. i read somewhere that a child starts to look like the other parent as he/she grows old. and i feel elated every time someone tells me i look like my mother. thanks again, sue.
love this photo and have to agree that i see so much of you in your mother; i think many times we have difficulty recognizing ourselves when we search in the faces of loved ones, or get so used to being told that we 'take after' one side more than another that our eyes are blind. i look at logan, my youngest grandson, and he is this perfect blend of everyone, not just his parents, but of both sides of the family that it is amazing! quite the store of memories this challenge is stirring up, heh?
@catsmeowb - "quite the store of memories this challenge is stirring up, heh?" - you said it! who knew beatles' songs are like a pandora's box? thank you so much, camille.
Oh wow. Have been too busy to be on here much. Just saw this post. Wow. I am almost speechless. I know you said how I was lucky to have had my mom all those years, and how I got to be with her as an adult. Yes, I was lucky. Bless your heart. It is almost like your Mom saved you...because she left the world. because once she was gone, you took a different path and ended up in a better place. Our moms give us the greatest gifts, don't they? And you do look like your mom! Totally!
@espyetta - thank you so much, MB. i'm going to show my siblings all these comments about me looking like our mother because i know they won't agree! :-)
gorgeous photo! having been raised by his Aunt Mimi, losing his mother just when he was beginning to build a relationship with her made a huge impact on John Lennon who had already had to choose between his birth parents: Lennon's father was at sea when he was born and spent much of Lennon's early years working away. One day he visited Mimi and asked if he could take his son to the seaside at Blackpool - but really he was secretly intending to emigrate to New Zealand with him. Mimi told Julia that John had gone on a trip with his father and Julia followed them...and after a heated argument his father forced the five-year-old to choose between them. Lennon twice chose his father, but as his mother walked away, he began to cry and followed her. It would be 20 years before he had contact with his father again
i've been writing a novel based on my parent's experiences but i realize that while i could write and romanticize my father's experiences, i have been reluctant to write about my mother. it is not of course that i don't want to write about her, in fact i really do. but every time i get into it, i get depressed and i just cry, perhaps because i feel i cannot bring into paper and give justice to the hardship she had experienced and i feel guilty that she died not knowing how it was to have "a little something" and enjoy a few pleasures, as i had just started working around that time. i remember she cried when i gave her my entire first pay and told her to take care of it for me.
@karenann - thank you, karenann. in the collage yesterday, her close up photo is the one in the right upper corner. she was 17 in there and already had 3 pregnancies. a child having children, hard to believe.
@bkbinthecity - it was quite an experience growing up. i guess i took after my father - he was a jack of all trades but master of none. he had a lot of talents, knew a lot of things and how to do them just by reading. he did not finish grade six and my mother didn't finish grade four, i guess that was why they inculcated in our minds about the importance of education. thank you.
@jannkc - thank you, jann. my sentiments exactly. my father didn't want me to continue my studies after high school, despite two scholarships to university. but i insisted on going to college, taking something at least, far from washing clothes or selling at the market. not that i looked down on those, but i felt i have enough smarts to make it through university. i thought if i can have a good job, i can help the rest of my siblings to get a better education, and then maybe have a better life. mission accomplished.
@russianblue - thank you, kass. following one's will, of course, does not come easy. there were a lot i also had to give up, but all in all, i'd do things all over again, except for a thing or two.